How much baggage is too much baggage? Where does one draw the line? Finding a happy medium? Well this is the problem in dating.
I get that we’re coming out of a recession and that 12% of the country is unemployed right now. But do they ALL have to be on dating websites trying to get ME to go out with them? I decide for some reason to go back to my Craig’s List reserves and try ONE more time.
“Mark” is attractive, pretty funny, a good conversationalist and thinks that I’m hot so I decide that we should meet. Our first date is a walk in the park. Literally. The weather was nice and we got to know each other a little better so I guess it could have been worse. He calls me for a second date and explains to me that he’s recently lost his job so do I mind just watching a movie. At my house. Jeez. Thankfully it’s a weekend the kids won’t be around so I agree. The time for the date approaches and he calls me and asks if I can pick him up. His car has been repo’d. Double Jeez. So I ask for his home address so I can get directions. He tells me he’s going to be out “doing some stuff” and that I can come grab him at a grocery store near his house. Whatever.
The date goes fine. Lots of talking, some movie watching and maybe a little kissing on the couch. We decide to end the date and I have to drive him home. We start talking during the drive and I’m trying to pin down where he lives, because you know, I’m supposed to be driving him there. He tells me that I can just drop him back at the store. Ummmm, why? He goes into some speech how his “roommate” is a really private person and he has to respect that. Bull crap. I’m driving, I control this damn car and if he wants to get where he’s gotta go, he’s gonna answer some questions. So I push. He finally fesses up that yes he does have a roommate but his ex-wife and kids live there too. Gotcha. Me: “ And do you and your ex still sleep together?” Him: “Oh no, I sleep on the floor.” The pile is gettin higher. So I drop him off at the store and gladly leave.
He calls the next day to apologize and to see if we can go “out” again. I (laughing to myself and maybe a little at myself too) decide to see really how bad this is. So I tell him that if he wants to go out again that I need to know about everything. Lay all his cards out on the table. Turns out the ex isn’t even an ex. They’re “separated”. (Don’t ask me how you can possibly tell me that you’re separated from your wife when you still live together) He tells me that the marriage started to go downhill after they decided to become swingers. And oh yeah, when he was younger, there were a couple of jail stints after he got out of the Navy. Not for anything violent though, mostly for stealing stuff. Yeah, cuz that makes it better. And that, was the nail in the coffin. I tell him that I’m not really interested in seeing him again and he gets PISSED. He tells me he can’t believe that I won’t see him again after he was completely honest with me. I try to explain to him that the wife, not the honesty is the problem and as a general rule I try not to date married men but if his situation changes to give me a call. BAD IDEA.
About a year later, out of the blue, I hear from him again. Says he’s no longer with the wife, he has a job, the car is back and he’s going to be in town a few weekends from now and would I consider letting him take me out. After I confirm we would actually be going OUT and that I WASN’T going to be paying for the date I agree. Tells me to add him on facebook where we can talk. Ah, modern love. What did we ever do before facebook?
So I can’t help but notice there’s a chick on his page that posts like every day. Mostly about how much she loves him and how great they are together. Not really what I want to see about someone I’m supposed to be going out on a date with. So again, I push. And again, I get a cock and bull story. I kindly remind him how that didn’t work the first time and it’s not working this time either. He admits that he’s living with this chick but that he’s leaving her and moving back to the area. (By the way, the chick had no idea he was leaving, and the moving back to the area was back in with the roommate and the ex wife.) No thanks. Sorry you are NOT a winner. Please do not try to play again. This officially ends my hate/hate relationship with Craig’s List.
Unless of course I’m in some sudden need of pictures of penises and then I know right where to go. Until then, I’m staying away.
